"And They Overcame By the Blood Of The Lamb" Rev 12:11

Last weekend at our annual Womens Seminar at church I watched many of my sisters in Christ courageously share card board testimonies of what Christ has done in their life. There is the initial testimony of our savation, the assured moment we accept Christ as savior and then subsuquent testimonies of passages of death we go through as believers. Some cried as they publically shared how Christ has given them new life in Him. It was so powerful and moving. The theme for the weekend was the Cross. "For God so loved the world that He gave his only begotten SON that whoever believes in Him will not perish but have everlasting life. John 3:16"

Timing is everything and the weekend prior to the seminar was Easter or better described as "Resurrection Day" as we celebrate the "Risen Lord Jesus." Those who have accepted Jesus as Savior have a testimony of life before Christ and life after Christ whether we are 4 years old or 104 when we ask Him in our heart and acknowledge our sin and our need of His forgiveness and grace through His death and sacrifice on the cross.

One of the sessions that really spoke to me was "My response to the cross." As I consider my Jesus, and what He did for me, how am I going to let Him live through me for the rest of my days. My prayer is rid me of myself I belong to You. Lead me to lay my life down for You to love others through me. God's overwhelming love for us compells us to lay down our life for Him. One of the ways we can do that is to share with this lost world what Jesus has freed us from. "And they OVERCAME him by the blood of the lamb and by the word of their testimony. Rev 12:11" Everytime I share testimony of what Jesus has done through my life a piece of me is healed. When we give our life away in faith abandoning self for Jesus, He is pleased and glorifyied and we overcome. When His love so fills our heart we can't help but want to share it with all those around us. His love through us loving others. We do it for them to know Jesus because of our love for them. His love is unending and increases giving us capacity to love more and more. Jesus IS the fountain of life and He gives living water. The Holy spirit living in us enables our love for them to exceed our self-preservation. His love for them moves us beyond our fear to walk in full faith and surrender and it becomes all Him and no longer us. Genuine love comes from God, not us, it can't come from us. We don't have it in us to produce a pure, genuine love. Only Jesus perfect sacrifice on the cross atones for all our sin and forgiveness we need to genuinely love others with His love.

I have a gift of evangelism. God has given me a desire to teach and encourage others to share their testimonies of God's work in their life. I have always been encouraged to hear and read testimonies of how God delivered believers giving me hope that if He could do it for them, He could do it for me. He has. I encourage you if you have never written out what the Lord has done for you to do so. It will be healing and freeing and I promise you the Lord will bring someone or many in your path to share what He has done. The blood of the lamb has covered you to speak HIS truth and by this you will overcome. His kingdom is an unseen army of angels He gives His charge over us to stand in our place and enables us to speak the word of truth. As members of His Kingdom He empowers us with His authority.

More to share on this...

Bitterness TURNED To Joy

"And Hannah was in bitterness of soul, and prayed to the Lord and wept in anguish 1 Sam. 1:10."

I recently finished studying 1 Samual. As I reflect on the characters I relate so much to Hannah. Hannah was married to Elkanah who loved her but he could not give her what she desired. She was sorrowful in soul because the Lord had shut her womb and she had no children. To make matters more difficult Elkanah had another wife Peninnah who had children and she provoked Hannah severely. Her constant taunting drove Hannah to depression.

When she was falsely accused of being drunk while pouring her heart out in fervant prayer to God, I love how she owned her pain and did not deny it before Him. She said, "I am a woman of sorrowful spirit v15." Day after day she lived with this grief in her heart and yet her devotion to the Lord in her sorrow was evident and did not waver as she made the annual treks to Shiloh to worship God.


There was only One that she could TURN to who could answer and give her the desire of her heart. The Lord-Johovah-sabaoth. When she shared her petition with the priest, he said to her "Go in peace, and the God of Israel grant your petition v17." She went her way, her face no longer sad and the Lord answered her petition and she bore a child Samuel which she dedicated to the Lord to be His forever.


I can so personally relate to Hannah as Michael and I have had 4 miscarriages after Josh was born. I ran from my pain and denied it initially. I didn't think I did. I thought I had grieved and poured out my heart to God only to come to realize a few years later that I had been carrying bitterness in my heart from those losses and from pain in my teens and early 20's which I had not fully accepted nor surrendered. Suffering severely with bi-polar which I kept hidden from most people fearing their rejection and lack of acceptance if they really knew the truth about me. I covered it up by trying to appear perfect and performing for their approval. What an exhaustion. All the while I was seeking the Lord and never turned from Him but the Lord was driving me to a place of death and full admittance and full exposure which I feared. I couldn't run from the truth any longer. I stood and said "Yes, Lord I am bitter about my circumstances. I am bitter and broken and in agony of pain before You. YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN DELIVER ME FROM MY SORROW AND PAIN!"


Bitterness is a progression, as I learned, by God's design even though I fought it. Heb 12:15 says, "look carefully lest anyone fall short of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up causes trouble, and by this many become defiled." My root of bitterness was etched in years before I accepted Jesus as my Savior. As the Lord sanctyfies me He shows me my heart and what is there. It didn't matter the circumstances that he used, they are different for each one of us, only He knows the instruments needed to perform the heart surgury necessary. The wretchedness that He is purifying and purging. Repentance is agreeing with God about what is there and TURNING to Him and His word for cleansing and healing. It is the truth that sets us free not cover up for self preservation. To often instead of TURNING to God we run. We run from marriages, from our jobs, from relationships and from our churches. We blame others, put others down while raising ourself up, we stand in our accomplishments and our wealth and religiously work to deny our hurt refusing to acknowledge idol worship and give Christ Lordship over our situation in faith.


The problem begins when we don't think He Sees our situation. If He did how could He possible allow it to continue. Instead of dying to self we rely on false refuges rather than TURNING to the only True Reliable Deliverer- Jehovah-sabaoth. We don't believe HE is bigger and stronger. He is. When there is no other recourse for deliverance and we find ourself powerless and there is no other help, we can run to our Jehovah-sabaoth. He is the One who delivers and the One who judges. He leads us to the place where our knees are continually bowed before Him. God is not pleased when we honor Him with our lips and not with our lives. He is the strong tower- the RIGHTEOUS run into it and is safe.

Hannah was righteous in her heart and the Lord heard her cry. He turned her bitterness to joy! She was misunderstood, she had no where else to go and was provoked continually. Her strength was in God as she said, "My heart rejoices in the Lord, there is no One Holy like You, there is no other Rock like our God 1Sam 2:1-2." From this time on she had Holy confidence in her God and Deliverer. She smiled at her enemies they had no power over her!

Surrendering my bitterness and acknowledging it before the Lord has brought a freedom, peace and joy to my own heart. Jesus has given me contentment and His love and His Presense satisfies my heart completely. There is no other place that I long to be then at His feet worshiping Him. Thank you Jesus! I still experience disappointment but I know my God and trust that He Sees and knows what is best and that He alone is the "safe place" to run.

Has the Lord brought your life and circumstances to a place where only He can deliver you? TURN to Jesus and pour out your heart to Him. He alone saves and is waiting with open arms to deliver and comfort you with Himself.

False Prophets and Empty Oracles

Jesus said "many false prophets will rise and show signs and wonders to deceive, if possible even the elect. Mark 13:22." In a day where we are inundated with teachers, we have to be so careful not to follow teachers whose doctrine does not line up with the word of God but lead many astray. In Jeremiah 23, we learn how to determine a true and false prophet. V. 16-17 says "The false prophets speak a word from their own heart, Not from the mouth of the Lord...they walk according to the dictates of their own heart." V 21-22 says "I have not sent these prophets, yet they ran. I have not spoken to them, yet they prophesied. But if they had stood in My counsel, and had caused my people to hear My words, then they would have TURNED them from their wicked ways and from their evil doings." Nelson's commentary explains, "The false prophets proclaimed a false hope of peace and security. They lack true knowledge and a word from God, the false prophets repeated false hopes and twisted God's words. The false prophet turned God's word to their own desired benefit." "A true prophet must be sent by God with a word from God. A true prophet of God calls people to repentance of sin or evil and to renewed faith." False teachers usurp the way of death to self and lead people after themselves. They lead others wickedly after themselves and do not teach them the way of repentance. They sow discord and are fleshly, concerned and led by popularity and position rather than being genuine servants of Christ through death to self. When we genuinely love we will speak the truth as we have lived that truth through suffering for Christ.

The culture today bombards us with a barage of methods to self-preserve. Self-help books, fortune-telling, and religion bandaid the heart where the real issues are. To Fight this deception we need to study God's word and come together corporately as a church to learn the ways of God verses the counterfiet.

"Unless a grain of wheat fall into the ground and die, it remains alone, but if it dies it brings forth much fruit. John 12:24" Lord give us discernment regarding the teachers we follow, that their message and life points to the cross of Christ.

Love Is The Final Fight

Last summer I went to the Greater Philadelphia Writer's Conference at Philadelphia Bible College. There was a wonderful speaker there named John Perkin's. He delivered a message called Love is the final fight. At 80 years old, he shared his personal testimony that has impacted my life greatly. He was beaten by a group of white men years back. God called him to forgive and love those men who nearly killed him.



The Lord calls us to love those who persecute us, mistreat us, and spitefully use us. When we are reviled against we are called not to revile in return. But to love our enemies.





We have to recognize who the real enemy is and it is not other people. Ephes. 6:12 says "We do not wrestle with flesh and blood (people) but against principalities, against powers, and the rulers of darkness of this age..." We wrestle with the demonic beings working through them. In Warren Weirsbe's book What To Wear To The War, he says "We are wrestling against an organized demonic conspiracy-principalities, powers, rulers of the darknes of this world and spiritual wickedness in high places. He wants to rob us of the inheritance we have in Christ. In order to successfully defend ourselves from his vicious attacks, we must learn to stand in the power of Christ" and His love.

We cannot stand in our natural strength but in the power of the Holy Spirit living in us. When we ourself are free from sin - vengeance, jealousy, judgement, pride, self-righteousness, selfishness, selfish ambition, rebellion and control, then God frees us fully to allow His love and joy to flow through our life to others. Without knowing the Lord Jesus and His word it would be impossible to genuinely love with no conditions, no expectations and with a pure heart. Love reaches out to build a bridge where there isn't one. Bridges are pictures of God's grace, love and mercy.

When God's love becomes stronger than our pain we can be a vessel He can use to love and offer grace and forgiveness. It takes time to work through our hurt and pain and brokeness. But if we TURN to Him and surrender it, in our weakness, He becomes strong. We would never know the power of His love and His amazing grace if we have never been hurt or broken. There are treasures in darkness that cannot be known any other time or place then when the Lord removes everyone else aside and it is just Him and us. The more we seek Christ and His word the more we see our own need for Him and the forgiveness we need. When we truly grasp the depths of our own sinfulness we cannot point our finger at others as seeing their sin greater then our own. When we realize the depths of the forgiveness and cleansing of sin we need for ourselves, how can we ever cast stones at others. Having received this atonement through the cross for ourself, Jesus love and fogiveness free us to love others. He who is forgiven much loves much.

Love is a choice not a feeling. Each act of obedience where we chose to love in spite of our feelings sets us free. Forgiveness only comes through FAITH in Christ. It is willingly releasing someone else from what they have done and the hurt they have caused. As we receive His forgiveness and grace we can extend that to others. One of the secrets of life is learning how to LET GO of the past and LET GOD live through us in the present.

If you have never accepted Jesus as your Savior, invite Him in your heart. Tell him you know you are a sinner and ask His forgiveness. Receive His free gift of forgiveness and His grace that will set you free. Thank you Jesus Your love is liberating and freeing.

Changed In The Presense Of The Lord

In the last post we saw David in the cave of Adullum, depressed and broken before the Lord. He was isolated feeling caved in and submitted to the Lord.


In 2 Corinthians ch 3 and 4 we see Paul's hardship of defending his ministry as a genuine apostle of Christ. He was accused of walking according to the flesh, being deceitful, living for his own interests and charged that he was raising money to enrich himself. His integrity was in question and he said in ch 1 that he despaired even of life. Similar to David, he suffered while genuinely following the Lord.


Paul gives us rich insight how he did not trust in himself but in God who raises the dead. His letters to the church teach us how to press past our feelings to trust and depend on the Lord. Paul knew what it was like to feel boxed in a corner. I can so relate how the enemy at times can try to paralyze me that I am unable to express myself.


Yesturday afternoon in the Recovery Bible I was reading 2 sections of commentary that relate to the inner struggles that we face. Pg. 402 says, "When injustices have caused us pain, we often seek to bury them in the deep recesses of our mind. Being dishonest with ourself this way always allows pain from the past to translate into mistakes and suffering in the future. We often become powerless against the strength of our inner turmoil. We lose control of the very feelings we have tried to hide....There maybe so many strong emotions that we don't know how to process appropriately so we try to stuff them down inside. Eventually these feelings are expressed in some way. We need to be honest about our past hurts, express our feelings, confront the guilty, and work through forgiveness. If we try to ignore these hurts, we will be controlled by our explosive hidden emotions." At times this can be frustrating because we need to wait on God for timing and the rejection we recieve when speaking the truth can be painful and cause separation.

My need for approval dictated alot of my actions until the Lord showed me the danger and ensnarement of fearing man above God. I'm learning how to let go of situations that I have not fully been able to explain myself or have felt misunderstood by trusting that the Lord and His word are my covering and stand in my place to defend me when I do not have that opportunity to speak. This is building my trust in the Lord and taking the pressure off of my performance and need to appear perfect in the sight of others. This is God's grace and Presense living in me. Sometimes the situations that cause us to feel boxed in are the situations Christ is calling us to speak out about and it takes faith in Him and not in ourself to do so.

In 2 Cor 4:8 Paul says, "We are hard-pressed on every side, yet not crushed, we are perplexed, but not in dispair, persecuted, but not forsaken, struck down, but not destroyed." Paul recognized the limits of himself and that the power to deliver him comes from God and not himself or anyone else. The word crushed means to be constrained, reserved, and crowded into a narrow space. This describes the feeling of being troubled on every side. The feeling of affliction on the outside and fear on the inside.




Can you relate to this this feeling like you are utterly at a loss seeing no way out?




Paul was so motivated by the grace of God in his life that his words in chaper 3 share how he was able to stand and resist his afflictions. In v 5, he recognized that he was helpless to think that his sufficiency came from himself. Paul had holy confidence in Christ only to deliver him.

The key verse that Paul shares and is my continual encouragement when I feel backed in is v 16 "when one TURNS to the Lord, the veil is taken away. Now the Lord is the Spirit; and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty." When we TURN to the Lord we are transformed. The word transformed means metamorphosis. In the Lord's Presense, we are changed by His Spirit and His word in us. My Nelson's commentary explains "As we behold the glory of God in the Word of God, the Spirit of God transforms us into the likeness of Jesus Christ. This is the description of the gradual process of sanctification."





When we TURN to the Lord, He changes us on the inside that we can stand in the face of our hardship in the power of God and His word. Pg 1482 of the Recovery Bible says, "Many humanistic recovery programs and other means for dealing with pain may seem effective in the short run, but success through them rapidly fades. The new life that God offers through an ongoing relationship with Jesus Christ is the only means to permanent recovery. Pouring out our heart to him, giving Jesus all of our hearts concerns is the only way to freedom and life.



Ps 118:5 says, "I called on the Lord in distress; The Lord answered me and set me in a broad place. The Lord is on my side; I will not fear. What can man do to me? The Lord is for me among those who help me." The word broad means wide-spacious, clear, open, obvious. How freeing this is how we can take our cares to Him and leave them at the cross as He moves us out of the darkness of feeling crowded in to an open spacious place in the light.

Adullum-Sealed Off Place

In a small group I am studying the life of David from 1 Samuel. This is the 3rd time in the last 1 1/2 years I've studied 1 Samuel. I must be dense in some areas the Lord is speaking to me. God's word is alive and I have learned different insights with each lesson.

In 1Sam chapter 21 we see David flee from Saul who was trying to kill him because he was jealous of David. David was taken captive by the Phillistines and brought before King Achish. His life was in jeopardy and he was so afraid that he pretends to be insane. The king releases him not wanting a madman in his sight. David was on the run alone. Desperate. Completely striped of all resources and everything of his own strength. God had removed his closest friend Jonathan, his family and he was defenseless.


He escaped to the cave of Adullum which means "sealed off place"-resting place. This was the place God was leading him to all along.

It was in this place that David had no where to look but up. He surely was on his knees as he cried out to the only One who heard and answered. This was the place deep in his soul where self was dethroned and the mighty Lord was put on. David poured out his heart as he wrote ps 142, ps 56, and ps 34.

In ps 142, David cried to the Lord and poured out his complaint before Him. He acknowledged that everyone deserted him and his own refuge had failed him, that his enemies were stronger then he was, that he was being persecuted, and that he felt like he was in prison and brought very low. This was probably the darkest time in his life thus far. A time of depletion and full exposure. The Lord had been chiseling and building his character.



In Ps 56, David questions God twice saying, "What can flesh do to me?" He pleads, " What can man do to me?" In v 1, He prays for relief from his tormentors that were causing his oppression. In v 3, He tells God how afraid he is. In v 5, he expresses how frustrated he is that his enemies are twisting his words leaving him feeling misunderstood. He says, "Will my enemies escape their iniquity? As he calls on the Lord to, "Put all his tears in a bottle?





Do you know this feeling? Have you ever been in this place?




I've been to the cave of Adullum. It was a place of bitterness and brokeness when I entered. But sweet and healing and freeing as I let the Lord carve out the poisen in my heart. I hated being there. I fought it with everything in me. I kicked and screamed and ran with every bit of might I had. I was scared more then any other time in my life. I was alone, desperate and wept for days. The Lord was using instruments (circumstances, people, etc.) as tools to open my heart and force me to admit my bitterness and sin. It hurt so much I could hardly stand it. I wanted to just die. It was the place God was leading me to all along. It was there that I poured out a 16 page letter to HIM about my pain and injustice, my hurt and misunderstanding. The tools (situations) He uses are different for everyone. He will use whatever is necessary to accomplish His purpose to deplete us of self and all human effort for the goal of driving us to our knees in utter helplessness so that HE can show us WHO HE IS. He listened to me. He met me. He answered me.


Adullum- A place of rest and dependency where the Presense of the Lord dwells with the broken-hearted that no one else can enter but us and the Lord. We learn to worship and fear Him only. Fearing anything other than God can evoke feelings of anxiety, impending danger, panic or dread. Fear can stem from unchecked sin or sin that has never been repented of which was why Saul feared David. We can contrast David's fear which arose while he was being hunted down-the innocent victim. The thought of confronting our fears wherever they come from can be overwhelming at times but fearing and pleasing the Lord and bringing it ALL to Him bring peace and rest to our heart and mind.


Ps 56:9 gives us a glimpse of David's emotions in that cave, he says, "I know God is for me." Four times he says, "In God I will praise and I will trust." We too can know and expect that God WILL meet us and be there for us. In V 3 he says, "Whenever I am afraid, I will trust in You."

In ps 34, David praises the Lord for delivering him from all of his fears. V 5 says, "They looked to Him and were radiant, And their faces were not ashamed." When we come to God as David did we find ourself transformed and He removes our shame. V 17-18 share how he was honest before God about his fears, "The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears, and delivers them out of ALL their trouble. The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those with a contrite spirit." We won't get anywhere with the Lord until we are completely truthful about the condition of our heart and honest about what we are going through.

V 11-14 tell us how David shared with others how to fear the Lord. He describes the definition of the man (or woman) who desires life; they keep their tongue from evil and their lips from speaking deceit. They chose good and not evil. They seek peace and pursue it.


Your pit might be so deep that you can't imagine that the LORD is bigger and deeper. HE is. Corrie Ten Boom said there is no pit to deep that He is not deeper still. It is true. The relief doesn't always come over night. It takes time for Him to work His patience in us and develop character qualities that may not surface for years. The key is faith and dependence in what we cannot see at the time but hope for in quiet trust. He promises to be with us through it all to bring us safely to the other side where we live in His love, grace and mercy.


There are prescribed seasons of brokeness in our life. We can't run from them. There are treasures in darkness that cannot be learned any other way. Let God do His work in you that you may overcome and give testimony of His deliverance in your life for His glory.

"Today If You Hear His Voice, Do Not Harden Your Hearts" Heb 4:7

We may find our self separated from God not sure how to approach Him and listen to His voice. We must first recognize God is God and He hasn't changed. He is waiting and available all of the time. He desires us to continually live in His presense.


In Andrew Murray's book Humility he says, "The blessings of the higher Christian life were often like objects exposed in a shop window- one could see them clearly and yet could not reach them. If told to stretch out his hand and take, a man would answer, 'I cannot; there is a thick pane of glass between me and them.' Likewise, Christians may clearly see the blessed promises of perfect peace and rest, of overflowing love and joy, of abiding communion and fruitfulness, yet feel that there is something in-between hindering the true possession. And what might that be? Nothing but pride."


Pride erects these emotional walls between us and the Savior. We erect these walls around our heart to protect ourself but they are counterfeit to what we really need. When we hide under false humility and pretense we separate ourself from Him and others.


Pride isolates us.


God uses trials, pain and adversity as His tools to move us in the direction of TURNING to Him. He allows brokeness into our life to crush these walls. Brokeness is always a pathway to blessing even though is can be painful.


When I was a little girl my dad would often say, "Your being pretentious,"-defined a false show of what is really going on, -while angry on the inside."




Another word might be denial. I had a tendency to deny my pain pretending it didn't exist. I used all kinds of protection-pride-being one of them. How I can easily deflect my own pain and busy myself serving or doing for others. We can avoid or cope with our own pain by trying to fix others or focus on their needs instead of our own. I am aware how perfectionistic and performance driven I can be feeling like I am accepted based on these behaviors.




This is part of approval addiction. The need to "appear" right on the outside, doing what is expected, and be in pain unchecked on the inside. This is also called hypocracy. The Lord reveals
every motive and attitude of the heart whether we are doing it for Him as led by Him or out of guilt to win the favor of others which points to ourself.

Today I have a relationship with the Lord and know the Lord in such a way that I trust Him with my weaknesses and as soon as I become aware that I am doing this, I bring it to Him as with all sin that separates me from Him. I do not need to be approved by certain individuals to feel good about myself. I don't have to hide my sin and my hurt from the Holy Spirit and pretend it is not there. I can focus on pleasing God and when I first deal with my own issues instead of everyone elses, I will be more effective in helping others.

Believing Jesus is our Present help, wherever we are, whatever we have done. I can live in His grace, help and favor and not in the bondage of works in my own effort stuffing the truth.
Freedom comes as we honestly and humbly bring these walls before God and ask Him to remove our pride and separation. He is ready, willing and able to hear this hearts request and to restore our fellowship with Him and keep our relationships healthy with others.